Thursday, December 13, 2012

My Review of the 12/12/12 Concert for Hurrican Sandy Relief

I made it through most of the 12/12/12 concert last night. 

Organized to aid the struggle of the many here in the tri-state area after the devastation of Hurricane Sandy, it was as Mick Jagger -- stick-thin and suggestively squirmy as ever --  said: "the largest collection of old, English musicians ever assembled in Madison Square Garden." He wasn't kidding.
The "Boss."

Throw in Bruce Springsteen, Billy Joel -- looking pretty gnarly in high-def (not that I'd look any better), a satin-skinned Alicia Keyes, the ever-sexy Jon Bon Jovi, the grizzled Pete Townsend and Roger Daltrey (wearing a suit from the 70's) representing "The Who," and you have an idea of some of the rock royalty in attendance.

Roger Waters of Pink Floyd showed up, still agile and rangy in his black tee and funky sneakers. His hair totally gray, he sang with Eddie Vedder, who can do no wrong but may not have been faking it about being "Comfortably Numb."
Smile, Mike, you get
residuals, don't you?

Chris Martin of Cold Play, not only did a nice acoustic set but also lured the perpetually melancholy Michael Stipe of REM out of his mausoleum for a song. And, yes, he is still losing his religion. It is reported that he did, indeed, smile last night but confirmation is pending.

Bruce Springsteen brought all his guys with him except, of course, for the incomparable Clarence Clemmons who passed away not too long ago.

His wife, Patty, was there, but shook her tambourine across the stage from her husband reportedly because of his display of the most amazing pit-stains ever revealed at the Garden...and that includes Elvis. Patty has obviously had it with Bruce and his refusal to wear a good Sports deodorant. She is, however, very relieved to have finally solved the "plumber's crack" issues that have plagued him in the past.

Joined by Jon  -- Oy, what a man! --  Bon Jovi, the two did some predictable but ever-enjoyable New Jersey rocking-out.

All Eric Clapton has to do, in my opinion, is simply walk onstage. Dignity and talent, thou art Eric Clapton. Remember, around thirty years ago, when I made a fool of myself in Manhattan when I saw you, Eric? You dont? Good.

Amidst all the warmth, high-fiving and rampant thumbs-upping that was going on, the Disney villain of the evening, Mr. Kanye West showed up decked out in a confusing combination of a black leather skirt and leggings underneath. 

He bounced around gamely but whether he'd pissed the lighting guys off before the show or, himself, chose the weird effects, his set was back-lit and strobey...and he seemed slightly off.
Back-lit and be-skirted.

He was neither rude nor overtly malevolent but he was something worse: he was boring as hell. Having seen him before, I was expecting better but wonder if, under the weight of all that heavy leather, he might have lost some of his steam. That was some skirt--pleats and all.
A kilt can be a very sexy thing on a man....those socks, that waist pouch, those laced shoes....think Sean Connery. But this was no kilt. Kanye wore a skirt. Perhaps he accidentally grabbed something discarded by his girlfriend, Kim Kardashian. Or a vengeful Taylor Swift may have been behind it, though that's doubtful since that would have forced her to take time off from her spree of promiscuity soon to be seen in a city near you. 
                         Her motto in this quest: 
                    "I shall leave no testicle unturned "

I love Billy Joel. Yes, he's a cranky old man now with a gigantic head that has, apparently, never known the benefits of sunscreen. Those crazy eyes have gotten droopier and his voice has been  roughened by years of God knows what but he still sounds great to this old girl.

Commanding the stage from a piano bench, he never fails to bring me back to a time when I didn't have all that much to worry about other than whether I'd wear my buffalo sandals or my Dr. Scholls to the beach that day.
Remember these, ladies? Did you know they were called "Buffalo sandals?"

My favorite act was The Rolling Stones. Mick simply has not slowed down at all. Prancing, sliding, side-stepping and flapping his pipe cleaner arms in those unmistakable signature moves, he is as apt to thrust his impossibly narrow pelvis at us at the age of 69-going-on-70 as he did when he was 25...and it still makes me feel young. 
Still has it...
...lost it a while ago.

Unlike Roger Daltrey's insistence on revealing his aging chest, the Stone's lead singer can still get away with it.

"Why? Because he is Mick Jagger, of course.

During the set, I realized that Ron Wood and I have the same hair-do and that Keith Richards may be the most amazing guy in entertainment today. I don't think I have seen anyone look worse...except my friend's 96 year old grandpa at a wake I attended many years ago in Brooklyn....and he was the one in the coffin.

Paul McCartney is a quintessential showman. Closing the show, he did a new-ish song about yet another wife (please, Paul, after you divorce this one, give up. You simply cannot recreate what you had with Linda) and some Wings but I admit that I also wanted a flat-out Beatles medley as well as a mention of John Lennon who was assassinated thirty-two years ago this week not all that far from Madison Square Garden.
Always cute.
Will he be sued?

All in all, despite some dozing and laser pointer playtime with the cats, the unflattering lighting of Billy Crystal's neck, Brian Williams acting like an idiot at the phone bank and my concern for one of my favorite people, Adam Sandler who, likely, used the tune of Leonard Cohen's magnificent opus "Hallelujah" without legal permission, it was a great night of entertainment.
Available in every dressing room
of the evening.

I hope Billy Joel starts using at least an SPF30 on his head, Roger Daltrey gets some new clothes (and glasses), Mick Jagger had enough Tylenol Extra Strength to endure his transatlantic flight home today and Taylor Swift wasn't hanging around backstage last night. 

In the old days any one of those guys could have handled her easily but times have changed and I suspect they were just all hoping Mick had enough Tylenol for sharing and weren't thinking much about their prolific, groupie-filled pasts.

I also hope the money gets to the people and the enightmare of Sandy can be put behind the thousands affected by the storm. And, as Billy Crystal said as the show ended, "Please don't light me from underneath again and God bless America."

And why, oh why, was Kristin Stewart dressed
like a football ref from Liverpool?


  1. A few comments:
    1.Ewww K Stew! She never looks good.
    2.Yes on T Swift. She’s ho-ey.
    3.Kanye is losing it ‘cause Kim is obviously driving him crazy.
    4.Did you notice how white the crowd last night was?!?

  2. Yes, ma'am, I did notice that....very white. The acts, for the most part, as well.

    And K-Stew is extra white.

  3. I enjoyed the show and agree with most of your assessments. I had to take Tylenol after just watching Mick and I'm still sore today.

  4. Everyone loves what you guys are up too. This kind of clever work
    and reporting! Keep up the fantastic works guys I've incorporated you guys to my own blogroll.

    Feel free to surf to my web site; a nudes

  5. Does your site have a contact page? I'm having problems locating it but, I'd like to
    send you an email. I've got some recommendations for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great website and I look forward to seeing it grow over time.

    Check out my webpage - homepage

  6. Good day! I could have sworn I've visited this web site before but after looking at some of the posts I realized it's
    new to me. Nonetheless, I'm certainly pleased I came across it and I'll be bookmarking it and checking back often!

    Feel free to surf to my web blog;
    my web page - see more

  7. Excellent blog here! Also your web site loads up fast!
    What web host are you using? Can I get your affiliate link to your host?
    I wish my site loaded up as fast as yours lol

    Take a look at my web blog :: visit website

  8. Saved as a favorite, I like your site!

    Feel free to surf to my web-site ::
    my web page :: more Hot Upskirt Shots Of Euro Beauty Anastasia 4242012

  9. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  10. I'm gone to tell my little brother, that he should also visit this weblog on regular basis to get updated from most recent gossip.

    My web blog:

  11. I really like it when people get together and share views.

    Great site, stick with it!

    Feel free to visit my blog click here

  12. I'm gone to tell my little brother, that he should also visit this weblog on regular basis to take updated from latest information.

    Feel free to visit my blog:

  13. I read this paragraph fully regarding the comparison of most recent and previous technologies, it's awesome article.

    My page ::

  14. Good answers in return of this difficulty with firm arguments and explaining all regarding that.

    Feel free to visit my web-site - see more

  15. always i used to read smaller articles that as well clear their motive, and
    that is also happening with this paragraph which I am reading at this place.

    My site: Young women with petite frames could be underdiagnosed for eating disorders

  16. Hey, I think your website might be having browser compatibility
    issues. When I look at your blog site in Opera, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping.
    I just wanted to give you a quick heads up!

    Other then that, wonderful blog!

    Check out my weblog HTTP://

  17. I am genuinely pleased to glance at this webpage posts which contains tons of helpful data, thanks for providing
    these kinds of data.

    Feel free to surf to my webpage for Young Orgies

  18. An impressive share! I have just forwarded this onto a colleague who has been
    conducting a little homework on this. And he actually bought me
    lunch simply because I found it for him... lol.
    So allow me to reword this.... Thanks for the meal!
    ! But yeah, thanx for spending some time to talk about this matter here on
    your site.

    Also visit my blog Recommended Web site

  19. Excellent items from you, man. I have be aware your stuff previous to and you are
    simply extremely magnificent. I actually like what you have got right here,
    really like what you are saying and the best way wherein you say
    it. You make it entertaining and you still take care of
    to keep it wise. I can not wait to read much more from you.
    This is really a great website.

    Feel free to surf to my web site ::

  20. Way cool! Some very valid points! I appreciate you penning
    this post and also the rest of the website is also very good.

    my web site: Read the Full Piece of writing

  21. Aw, this was an extremely good post. Spending some time and actual effort to generate a great article… but
    what can I say… I procrastinate a whole lot and don't manage to get nearly anything done.

    my homepage HTTP://

  22. Please let me know if you're looking for a writer for your blog. You have some really great articles and I think I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I'd really
    like to write some content for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine.
    Please shoot me an email if interested. Thanks!

    My web site: see more

  23. Hi there! I just wanted to ask if you ever have any problems with hackers?
    My last blog (wordpress) was hacked and I ended up losing many months of hard work due to
    no back up. Do you have any solutions to prevent hackers?

    Here is my blog post see more

  24. It is perfect time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy.
    I've read this post and if I could I wish to suggest you some interesting things or tips. Perhaps you can write next articles referring to this article. I desire to read more things about it!

    Also visit my page;

  25. You actually make it seem really easy along with your presentation but I
    to find this matter to be actually one thing that I believe I'd never understand. It kind of feels too complex and very wide for me. I'm looking ahead for your subsequent
    post, I will attempt to get the hang of it!

    Feel free to surf to my blog post ...

  26. Have you ever considered writing an ebook or guest authoring on other
    websites? I have a blog centered on the same topics you
    discuss and would love to have you share some stories/information.

    I know my readers would enjoy your work. If you are
    even remotely interested, feel free to send me an e mail.

    my web blog - Email Console

  27. Excellent website. A lot of helpful information here.
    I am sending it to a few buddies ans also sharing in delicious.
    And certainly, thank you on your effort!

    Feel free to visit my web page ...

  28. Hello! I know this is kind of off-topic but I had to ask.
    Does managing a well-established blog such as yours take a lot
    of work? I'm brand new to writing a blog however I do write in my diary everyday. I'd like to start
    a blog so I will be able to share my experience and views online.
    Please let me know if you have any recommendations or tips for new aspiring blog
    owners. Thankyou!

    my blog post ... in porn reviews

  29. This is a topic that's near to my heart... Take care! Where are your contact details though?

    Here is my blog post :: click here

  30. It's awesome to visit this site and reading the views of all friends regarding this paragraph, while I am also zealous of getting knowledge.

    my web blog;

  31. If some one needs expert view regarding blogging and site-building
    after that i propose him/her to visit this web site, Keep up the fastidious work.

    My page; right here