Monday, August 13, 2012

Party Animals

People like to brag about needing to recover from their wild weekends.

Come Monday, they are hung over or exhausted and may enjoy embellishing a story or two about the revelry. This makes them cool, enviable and, in the right circles, can significantly elevate their social status.

Yours truly is no stranger to an occasional wild weekend. Even mild mannered bloggers have been known to get a little crazy.

Take this past weekend, for example.

Here's what would go down at the water cooler come Monday morning (if I were anywhere near a water cooler)....
"Susan Says..." (yawning and snapping the waistband of her elastic pants as she sloshes coffee into a mug with a picture of a kitten sitting under a rainbow): "Oh, man. Another crazy weekend!!!" Whew! Holy cow!"

Impressionable coworker: "Yo, "Susan Says...," you sure look like you par-tayed har-tay. Fill us in!!"

SS: "Ooooooh, baby, I sure did. Last night was unbelievable!"

IC: "Details, please. We know what kind of a life you live, you lucky stiff! Don't hold back..."

SS: "I know you know. One of these days I have got to calm it all down and not be such a wild thing!"

IC: "Yes, INDEED! You are a wild thing!! So, tell us! TELL us!"

SS: "I really pushed the envelope this time! I hope you can handle it...."

IC (guffawing wildly): "Me, too!"

SS: "Well......on Saturday night I stayed up till about eleven playing with the cats and the laser pointer!

IC: "NO!"

SS: "Yes! They went nuts. They couldn't stop chasing that thing. They were spinning and running and leaping. It was FAR-OUT! I even gave them a pinch of catnip!!!!!!"

IC: "GET OUT! I rest my case---you really do know how to live. I gotta take a lesson from you!"

SS: "Hold on to your hat! As if Saturday night wasn't enough, yesterday Seth and I spent most of Sunday sitting around. I read the newspaper 
and he -- get this! -- took a two hour nap!"

IC: "WHAT? For real??? So he's a real party animal, too!!
SS: "He sure is! And then I made pineapple protein smoothies!"

IC: This just gets better every minute. I am so j-e-a-l-o-u-s! How come some people are just so naturally fun loving, so spontaneous? And the rest of us, well...."

SS: "Don't be jealous, man--join us! Next weekend we're planning a ride where there are usually some nice cows. We might even get to catch a glimpse of two horsies that live nearby."


SS: "Then, as if that isn't over the top, there's this guy who sells corn on the side of the road and it's on the honor system! You put money into this little metal box!!!!"

IC: "You have got to be kidding! You'd let me do this with you guys???"

SS: "Of course, happy to help spice up your dull little life! You have to reach for the brass ring, dude! We'll show you how it's done!!

IC: "I will be so totally burned out after all that. I don't know how you're even functioning today. I really don't."

SS: "To be honest, neither do I."


  1. Wow and I thought I lived it up because I went to the Chinese buffet on a Sunday night!

  2. Susan! You've been spying on us haven't you???!!!

  3. YAY! You're back!

    Swap out canines for the feline and you've got my life It's uber exciting.

  4. Yes, Janet---Google Spy Cam is very helpful!

  5. Thanks, Michele! Canines, kitties, it's all the same exciting life we lead!