Two Middle Aged Women Discuss Marijuana

Actual conversation between me and a fellow shopper --a woman about my age --  at Trader Joe's...

The scene: The organic poultry section where we were both listlessly patting the packaged drumsticks and antibiotic-free ground turkey.

Her: "This song reminds me of high school..."

Me: (focusing on the piped-in music and recognizing the familiar notes of "Saturday in the Park" by Chicago) "Yes, me too, I guess."

Her: "I used to smoke a lot of pot back then."

Me: "Is that so?"

Her: "I still do."

Me: "Okay."

She looked at me expectantly as if it were now my turn to elaborate upon my own hallucinogenic habits both past and present--of which there are none.

Me: (instead of nodding politely and continuing to my original destination -- the Pirate's Booty display, one aisle over) "I really didn't smoke pot."

Her: "I know where you can get some."

Me: (a little shocked at this point and not wanting her to know how totally uncool I am...plus I had just seen an episode of "Intervention" the night before and figured I was up for the challenge) "I have asthma. I can't smoke anything."

Her: "Put it in brownies."

Me: (now regretting that I'd allowed the conversation to go this far and wondering if this was some sort of entrapment sting, began to back away yet, inexplicably, responded again with another moronic statement) "Nah...too much sugar."

Her: "You can make tea with it! You put it in one of those little metal tea thingies that you hang over the edge of the cup..."

Me: "Oh, you mean a teaball!" (Why was I still talking?)

Her: "Yes! A teaball! I couldn't think of what they're called!"

Me: "I know! I forget words all the time these days!"

Her: "Getting older is a bitch!"

Me: "It sure is!"

Her: "Well, have a great day!"

Me: "You, too!"

Just another afternoon at Trader Joe's. How was your day?