Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Two Middle Aged Women Discuss Marijuana

Actual conversation between me and a fellow shopper --a woman about my age --  at Trader Joe's...

The scene: The organic poultry section where we were both listlessly patting the packaged drumsticks and antibiotic-free ground turkey.

Her: "This song reminds me of high school..."

Me: (focusing on the piped-in music and recognizing the familiar notes of "Saturday in the Park" by Chicago) "Yes, me too, I guess."

Her: "I used to smoke a lot of pot back then."

Me: "Is that so?"

Her: "I still do."

Me: "Okay."

She looked at me expectantly as if it were now my turn to elaborate upon my own hallucinogenic habits both past and present--of which there are none.

Me: (instead of nodding politely and continuing to my original destination -- the Pirate's Booty display, one aisle over) "I really didn't smoke pot."

Her: "I know where you can get some."

Me: (a little shocked at this point and not wanting her to know how totally uncool I I had just seen an episode of "Intervention" the night before and figured I was up for the challenge) "I have asthma. I can't smoke anything."

Her: "Put it in brownies."

Me: (now regretting that I'd allowed the conversation to go this far and wondering if this was some sort of entrapment sting, began to back away yet, inexplicably, responded again with another moronic statement) "Nah...too much sugar."

Her: "You can make tea with it! You put it in one of those little metal tea thingies that you hang over the edge of the cup..."

Me: "Oh, you mean a teaball!" (Why was I still talking?)

Her: "Yes! A teaball! I couldn't think of what they're called!"

Me: "I know! I forget words all the time these days!"

Her: "Getting older is a bitch!"

Me: "It sure is!"

Her: "Well, have a great day!"

Me: "You, too!"

Just another afternoon at Trader Joe's. How was your day?


  1. What a crazy conversation! WHy doesn't anything interesting happen to me at Trader Joe?

  2. How much pot did you really smoke?

  3. I wish I'd been a fly on the wall and seen your face.
    Funny post.

  4. It's TRUE! You really are my twin sister!! :-) Marijuana makes me sneeze (and I have NEVER smoked any - or eaten it... or whatever...)

  5. This sounds like something that would happen to me!

  6. Omg, your trader joes is I way more fun than ours. But how would you know, clearly you are more square than Spongebob. Lol
    Great post.


  7. do it do it do it - you'll live so much better ♥ and SHOP TRADER JOES hee hee

  8. nice article... did you got get pot. Janet NZ of course it makes you sneeze, its a flower. my nose starts running just from opening the bag. PS susan, it stops asthma attacks in 2 puffs, like an inhaler only faster. it doesnt make you see anything strange, like hallucenate. its weed, not acid

  9. That is pretty odd! But cannabis does help with asthma and you can get it in a tincture. Cute story!

  10. ...roses are flowers... they do not make me sneeze...

  11. Janet, I can't say I never tried it but I just coughed a lot. My drug of chouice has always been carbs of some sort!

  12. Michelle, things like this happen to ma ll the time! Thanks for reading today!

  13. Hahahaha, Scott! I knoew Sponge Bob and I had something in common. Thanks for pointing it out!

  14. Hi, Anon..stops asthma? Really? Anything smoky just shuts down my lungs...

  15. Anon, Tincture of Cannabis, eh? There's no medical marijuama here and my neighbors would just get too much entertainment if I got arrested. Thanks for the advice, too!

  16. Did you at least find out where you can get it to share with the rest of the class?

  17. Ahhhh, Tracy W., that gave me a good laugh. I didn't ask my new friend at Trader Joe's but I bet it's pretty easy to find out!

    Thanks for your comment!

  18. LOL!!! Love the story and love TJ's. Yes, cannabis helps with many medical conditions.

  19. An interesting thing I have recently discovered is that if you're using it to assist in pain management, you don't really get high!

  20. Now, Kellie...if only one could get some at Trader Joe's. Now that would make perfect sense. Thanks for reading!

  21. Interesting, Anon...I did not know that.