Monday, February 13, 2012

My Annual Snarky Review of the Grammy Awards

Adele, the big
The Grammys have been one of my favorite award shows since I was a kid.

I count on them for outrageous behavior, crazy fashion and at least one slightly disturbing reunion of aging rock stars there to receive some sort of lifetime achievement hoo-ha.

Last night's show, significantly toned down as a result of Whitney Houston's death the previous day, wasn't nearly as insane, or entertaining, as last year's ceremony.

I thought LL Cool J did an excellent job as host, managing to keep the show respectfully aware of the loss of Miss Houston as well as maintain a festive atmosphere.

There was great music--Adele returned with a fabulous performance of "Rolling in the Deep" after vocal chord surgery and Bruce Springsteen showed that he is still "The Boss" although I miss Clarence Clemons and still long to see -- but am afraid to know -- what is under Steven Van Zandt's bandana.

Jennifer Hudson knocked my sock's off with her tribute to Whitney-- a moving and beautiful rendition of "I Will Always Love You", managing to prove Simon "You're Just Not Good Enough, Jennifer" Cowell wrong for the thousandth time.

There was also the ageless showman and recently knighted Paul McCartney, re-energized by another new wife (did he or did he not sign a pre-nup this time?) performing the new "My Valentine" as well as closing the show with some Beatle's favorites.

Yes, I am having the
tip of my nose whittled
down to nothing.

Chris Brown provided the zumba instruction portion of the evening, there were several dead Beach Boys propped up on stage for a 50th aniversary performance while canned music played behind them and Katy Perry, with a bad blue perm, traded in sweet/sexy for space alien/S&M.
Reason to smile:better hair
than anyone on earth.

Bruno Mars didn't disappoint, both with his snappy choreography or the height of that amazing pompadour, Nicki Minaj proved more boring than controversial with an interminably dull on-stage exorcism and Fergie debuted a brand new nose-alteration a la LaToya Jackson while Bonnie Raitt and Reba McIntyre were botoxed to the point where they could barely open their mouths.

Taylor Swift moved one step closer to obscurity (I hope) and the Foo Fighters* proved yet again that mediocre rock and roll, when unchallenged in its category, will win awards.

Best new artist went to Bon Iver. I just spent some serious time on Youtube listening to them. I liked some of their stuff but suggest the lead singer remove the vise from his balls before he does permanent damage.

I also think that Diana Ross should have been given her award during the show instead of having it mentioned when she was introduced as a presenter. After all, did she not lay the groundwork, some 40 years ago for Whitney and so many others?
All in all, the Grammys were understandably quieter and more somber than in years past. The biggest shock of the night took place in my own home when Seth commented that he liked Lady Gaga's face net and scepter.

This has put a whole new spin on Valentine's Day tomorrow. I'm glad I saved the grocery net from the trunk of my old car--I will be trying it on for size in just a bit.

Now, take a moment to enjoy Jennifer Hudson's beautiful performance from last night....

*I know I'm going to take some hate for my  Foo Fighters comment but not only do I stand by it but deep in your hearts, you know I'm right.


  1. How could you not like the Foo Fighters? Other than that, I kinda agree with you on most stuff.

  2. Talking smack about Taylor swift no less? She's awesome. You're crazy as crazy can be.

  3. Sorry, Anon#1--to me, they're dullsville.

    Thanks for reading not verbally abusing me!

  4. Never denied being crazy, Lulu...thanks for taking the time to comment!

  5. I noticed that Fergie's nose looked weird. It's like she can't stop getting work done. She looked completely different several years ago.

  6. Great article Susan! I totally agree with you.....i've loved the grammy's for soooooo long, but am beginning to feel my age when i watch most of the acts.
    I agree with you about the Foo Fighters......i just cannot stand them and have to mute the TV when they're on......same with the wife beater: Chris Brown. Why he gets ANY adulation is beyond me.......
    Could not quite figure out the Beach Boys routine....nor could i figure out what was going on with Nicki Minaj......or as Ryan Seacrest called her: little red riding hood".......
    I loved Paul McCartney and held my breath as he ran across the stage.....doesn't he know that 70 year old men shouldn't run?
    BTW......Sir Paul was knighted 15 years ago.......time flies, but then i also think that Woodstock was just a "few" years ago!!

  7. It actually pains me to read "Foo Fighters" and "mediocre" in the same sentence. Given I am a fan, but I also find that The Foo are a dying breed these days, that is AN ACTUAL ROCK BAND. And while I am not, say, a Springsteen fan or a Neil Young fan or even a Bob Dylan fan, I know that they are extremely gifted musicians and talented song writers. I would never call them mediocre, even though I don't really care for their sound (though Dylan and Springsteen have grown on me; Young I can take as long as someone else is singing).

  8. Sue, thanks for the laughs. You are 100℅ correct. Why the heck wasn't Lady GaGa performing. And I just loved Bruno Mars.

  9. Sue, thanks for the laughs. You are 100℅ correct. Why the heck wasn't Lady GaGa performing. And I just loved Bruno Mars.

  10. I'm with you on much of it as well. I missed the Grammys which is to say I didn't care enough to make sure I was tuned in. Often too much talking or canned poorly read jokes.
    I'm not a big Foo fan either, but agree that they are a rock band which appears to be dying in the Idol age.I watched Hudson's clip above and was stunned that she rocked the majority of it acapella.
    I am a bit saddened to know that you weren't aware that Stevie VanZandt can be seen quite bandana-less on so many seasons of The Sopranos...

  11. I agree, Adriana...and I will have to google older pics of Fergie but someone else told me the same thing.

    Thanks for your comment!

  12. Donna, it seems we think alike. especially about Chris Brown--phooey. And 15 years ago, really?

    So glad you stopped by!XO

  13. I didn't mean to offend you regarding the FF, Alicia.But to me, the awful word I used to describe them is how I feel...but youi are right, they are a dying breed. We need more rock bands!!! Hope all is well with are you liking not shoveling snow this winter?

  14. LuBee, is that you, Lucille?? Great to see you here!

  15. Scott, Little Steven was heavily be-wigged in th Sopranos, meaning that the top of his head was still concealed. There is something unholy happening on the top of that man's head. I still love him, though.

  16. I'm loving the snowless winter, but I'm still ready for 80* weather!

  17. Sue, it is indeed me. I was having problems accessing your blog on my home computer but have no problem on my Android tablet.